The statistic of Seafarer marriege

[lola]

The place was  pack with  usual crowd, from fishing vessel, to car ship, to container ship to tanker... This usual crowd is the people i  have to deal with day and night and thus required a patient of a saint, apart from tending to their needs of telecommunications and  a never ending queries of where to get this? where to get that? I need to buy this I need to buy that  all the stuff that they necessary  lacking along journey  I very much enjoy to be a helping hand  to the boys..
Dealing with them is sometimes put me in a situation where i have sometimes walking in a fine line tread , those personal issue that this sailors is dealing with  specially  the faculty of marriage.. I have  learned not to be prejudice  and judgmental   to any advice i could think off for them . Any advice i gave them is like  the scale that can only be measure  as  just passing by comment without giving any inclination to take any of my words as a final conclusion  to whatever they going true  but merely  a guidance... 

Statistically 2 out of 10 sailor i dealt with belong to the statistic of  "relationship that run a ground  "   some  can be salvage some  is in the point of abandoning the whole lot together, and some only required a new dimension  to recover the sloughs of what you called trials and tribulation....
The reasons of some marriage problem is vary  but mostly come down to the bottom line of "distant relation" or  the time spend apart  has finally taking its toll .. and sometimes  they simply grow out of the relationship, specially to those one that have married early and realize that they have grown apart due to the time the sailor spent time in sea .....
One of the biggest agenda of the sailors life is an enigma of  being apart to their love one...Trust will put to test, patience is measure, loneliness and any emotional hardship factor have to be set aside.Its a high price to paid for that economic institution of  marriage .
 
Marriage   a social institution , that recognized by law and abide by cultural custom, .. and does constructed  by solid foundations, of two individual person with intimate connection, And defining your future to someone we chosen to spent our life with...

As a  filipino who  have a strong practice of Catholicism, separation  is a stigma to our selves,  marriage is a Union  considered as a  beginning till the end vows ...  Its a compromise to spent the rest of your life with that individual... but what happen when your feelings is at stake,when that thing you called love is gone, and when somewhere along the journey you have met someone you considered soul mate, what about the issue of infidelity.. where you have to compromise your sanity  and happiness... There s a lot to considered there's is a lot to define....

living in a loveless relationship is like a life that have no more meaning.. To a sailor who traveled a lot   going 'home' is sometimes they only considered as duty , Children is another issue its sometimes the only thing that bind the couple into relationship.. the obligation to the fruit that have borne when that feelings  is still intimate...
When the filipino seafarer voice out their  problem about marriage  somewhere along the fine line my hearth is always touch... I wish I could have alter their course  the way they navigate their journey..This is a men who's  facing uncertainty, where  something in the horizon is looming  but unknown to them of what future hold for them..
To be  a sailor , to traveled the world free  and get paid, yet the harsh reality is there's a harsh   way to pay... Nothing in this world come free.. You could have everything  and still have none...

 Some seafarer is unfortunate enough to fall down to the category of broken marriage,  The final closure to each  chapter of our book of life, when the end finally met ,  and some is going true the long journey of healing themselves, forgiving themselves, accepting its over, and nursing the broken self... And hopefully find themselves a new prospective of life... another tale of a sailor life...

[Diane No.1]

Lola......... 25minutes to late.....lol

[lola]

......hindi po.

[lola]

..do I sound like a ship chandler?

[Diane No.1]

 

Hee hee

 

When there is a will, there is a way!!!!!

[lola]

.... I am damn sure I used the gangway lol!!!!

[lola]

ISPS  indeed restrict the flow or the visitors on board, however it is still up to the master discretion, it is his ship its up to him to make the call.. bearing in mind the security level in port is level one, still defending on which country youre in...

[lola]

SIR..... I AM MARELY STATING THE FACT..... HERE IN NEW ZEALAND THE PORT SECURITY COMPLY TO THE REQUEST OF THE MASTER, CHIEF MATE AND CHIEF ENGINEER TO ALLOWED VISITOR ON BOARD, THAT WHY I SAID DEFENDING ON WHICH COUNTRY YOURE IN ... PORT SECURITY TREAT THE CREW HUMANLY BELEIVING THAT LINGERING SOCIALY BENEFIT THEIR WELL BEING AND NEVER  ONCE TREAT CREW AS A PRISONER OF STEEL...VISITOR COMPLY WITH THE PORT RULES , AS IT IS A CUSTOM TERRITORY WHOS IN TURN GOT MORE JURISDICTION TO THE LATER....

[Diane No.1]

 

Now, now you two... stop yelling....

I think that you will find that each port in any country have slightly different rules, and every Captain has different rules which he abides by.

I have taken crew members back to their ship after they have had a few too many drinks and stopped at the security gates and the guys there have told me to take them back to the ship myself...
so it is up to the individuals how they abide to this trust, or do they break this trust and end up sneaking on board (which i know has been done)

When i have been invited on board a ship i have treated it with respect because this is the guys home, sometimes i can recipocate by sometimes inviting some of them back to my home, where they can relax, cook (if they want.... lol) telephone their family, have a few drinks, sing and have lots of laughs.. for some of them it is a real experience to visit someones home in a different country.

I have said i have been around the world but have never left New Zealand, because over the years i have meet people from all over the world. ( woops, i have been to Fiji and Australia)

  Keep coming guys cos i love your company......

[lola]

...thats what you called " the statistic of seafarer marriage".......

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